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PASSENGER OF LIFE

the feelings, emotions, mindset, and life of a student

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insomnia

Motivation | Poem an year ago!

The worlds just playing
It is just making you saying
You are making a fool out of yourself
What is wrong with you?
You can cut through them
You know they can’t beat you
You are just not working the way
Useless for me to say
They can’t understand you
Cause you are different
They think you can be bent
Show them what you are made of
Show them you can build your own tent
You think fast , they are slow
They will never last, they will never know
I say you go with the flow ,
Also target the priorities with your bow.
Sometimes attitude won’t just matter
Speak up loud, don’t just utter
People are going to talk at your back
They are just full bullshit sack
Show them what you are made of
Show them your fears
Let them know about your tears
Let them know about your story
Show them that you are worried
Show them that you care
Let them know that you are buried
Let them know what you can bear
Show them what is special about you
Show them what is that they don’t have
Let them know how to beable to see the other day
Let them know what isabout the other day
They will laugh at you,
You are your own kind
Don’t let others ruin your mind!
Do what you love to, have to!
Ignore could’s and make it happen!
If you will , I can pay your bill.!!
#1203am31082015MotivationCanMakeItHappen!!

Maybe;

Maybe you love me more
or, Maybe you love me less.
Maybe you miss me
or, Maybe you had forgotten about me.
Maybe I am your nightmare
or, Maybe I am your sweet dreams.
Maybe you cry yourself to sleep
or, Maybe you would careless.
Maybe you have got past it
or, Maybe you clinch on to it.
Maybe you cherish it
or, Maybe you regret it.
Maybe you want to come running
or, Maybe you want to runaway.
Maybe there’s thousands of thoughts
or, Maybe you think of me.
Maybe you get angry when you see my name
or, Maybe you smile and remember me.

I got no but’s with these maybe’s;
I got no more wishes;
I got no more excuses;
I got no more lies;
I got no nothing going on;
and, I ain’t running away no more.

I got to tell you the truth;
I got to hold on to you;
I got to dream with you;
I got to kiss you good night;
I got to hold you tight.

I know there’s no way.
I know you wouldn’t believe.
I know I gave you the reason not to.
I know I lost your trust.
I know I sent you away.

I really need you tonight,
like every other.
I really need you on sunshine,
like every other.
I really want to hold your hands,
like every other.
I really want to laugh and cry,
like every other.
I really want you for forever,
like every other.

#2359pm13072016Maybe

Thoughts & Nights!

There is a bunch of thoughts in my head, I think of writing about it, I always hit the blank pages everyday. I haven’t been so emotionally exhausted, driven , depressed, tensed , and a whole lot of other feelings. Honestly, I don’t really know what love is?. I have also been in relationships what didn’t workout as planned but I let them all go. I have a hard time trusting people on their words, technically it’s all I have known from this life, and that your tears don’t matter, you’d only be crying yourself to sleep but the next morning you’d wake to the best of thoughts maybe today she will talk, or share something, or just maybe your day will be fine. but you will only be hitting dead ends at the end of the day, and when you stop trying so hard to get yourself through the night, sneak in a little alcohol or smoke weed be high and try to calm your damaged mind. you may find peace within it. All it does is numb you or plunge you into your own thoughts you don’t want to think of. I am not a writer, I may write , some of them maybe good, I know they are appreciated, I don’t. when I try to write its my mind letting the things I wanna say take the form of words or whatever sentences it creates. its a curse. It will keep you awake on midnight. Make yourself more lonely and miserable than you have been. and then on other nights you won’t just sleep because you are whiny about little things happening to you all throughout this day, and then you would think of a future, trying to put yourself into a position as in your fathers, think about working hard and determined again in an era of competition only the best and clever survives. That’s when you, you’d think that living the life is scarier than death, when you die its all over, you die in a second, your pain would be over, but your share of pain would be on your family, but would it? thinking harder would cause dizziness and at-last you would sleep like never before.
I have been called nerd , geek , fool, nonsense, and what not, honestly I am just quiet, quiet as numb calls on a dead body. but in the likeness of life, love is just a word, the people who care for you are the ones that actually have a connection for you, the people that want you to succeed, want to listen to you humming, the people who prioritize you before the world, and the people that check on you before you close your eyes for the day, the people who remember you every night before the close their eyes for a tomorrow that’s gonna be harsh as ever , still hope’s to hear from you one last time, it’s what gets them dreams and they wake up each morning just for you. life’s so goddamn hard, if you have that person you are lucky, never let go of them, they are your share of life’s treasure.

 

I wish I cared a little more than what I did back that day, maybe the person would be by my side.

​Sat around the corner of the corridor

Sipping down champagne 

Watching the pouring rain 

Clear blue skies turning grey

Watched from the background 

As My life just fades away

While staying alive on life support 

The monitor beeps through every report

I closed my eyes once again

It’s the memories that keep me awake

I couldn’t help it, but

Whatever gets me through the night

Hoping to see her face by next sunlight 

I was so broken, more than a train wreck 

Losing her was so damn heart break

Wondering if I could have checked

The way things are now, 

Her thoughts keep me awake

 still hoping, that’s not easy to break

See her in his hallucinations 

It seems so sweet

But all it is, are nightmares 

That haunts him in his sleep 

His woulds are invisible

But it runs down so deep

Wondering if it all went wrong 

But everything that felt so right 

Whatever gets me through the night

I read her conversations just to make me sleep

I imagine kissing her forehead ,

She touched my soul so damn deep

It’s hard to forget her, when she gave me 

So much more than anyone to keep

These are all in my dreams

Whatever gets me through the night. 

Honestly I don’t want to give up on you just yet.

#309am070716whatevergetsyouthroughthenight

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